Thanksgiving Stress

Posted November 21, 2019

I want to look at this episode as a buffet of ideas for you and how to alleviate some of the stress and overwhelm as you get ready over the next couple of days. You might think of Thanksgiving as all the chaos and family time, which likely doesn’t feel great. Maybe this is a difficult time for you if you are trying to stick with certain food and drink goals. I want to help you by sharing ways in which you can shift your mindset and make this the most amazing Thanksgiving ever.

Topics in this episode:

You decide in advance
Optional thinking
You do not have to do any of it. You choose ti.
The ownership in choosing to do it, versus having to do it.
An exercise in setting your priorities and how to remain focused on them
Plan in advance

Transcript

Hello hello hello What is going on friends?
Well – we are one week away from Thanksgiving – can you even believe it?
Super side note – I mean can we slow down on the holidays? There are already Christmas specials on and decorations out –
Let’s enjoy Thanksgiving shall we?
Ok – so that is actually exactly what I want to talk to you about today.
I’m coming into this podcast like a little buffet of ideas for you
Different ways to maybe help alleviate some of the stress and overwhelm as you get ready over the next couple of days.
So let’s dive in
You get to make the holidays anything you want
What I mean is –
You might think it’s all chaos and crazy family time
Which likely doesn’t feel great
Or you can decide in advance that is is going to be the most amazing Thanksgiving ever
Seriously -‘you decide – in fact –
Decide now How do you want to feel this week leading up to
And on the actual holiday?
For me – I love the idea of feeling peaceful – and super grateful during this time
And knowing that ahead of time I can focus my brain on all the things that bring me peace and gratitude
Now / take the opposite side – if I think this is going to be crazy time because of the family guess what my brain will find?
All the crazy
Remember you guys – the brain wants to find evidence for what we believe to be true
Here’s what I mean
A lot of times we stress about all the things we have to do
We stress about all the things that could go wrong
This is – totally optional thinking
First off – you don’t have to do any of it
You choose to
Just recognizing that one shift can help with so much pressure
It’s funny – in the past I’ve had clients who want to tell me how – no – They have to do it all
That’s just another example of when we fight for our limitations
You don’t have to do it all
And telling yourself that over and over is not useful
Just check in with yourself and see how you feel when you take ownership of choosing to to it
Vs having to do it Made the difference?
Ok – next up
Set a list of priorities and ask yourself –
What do you want this day to be about
What is important to you
An interesting little exercise is to write a list of all the things you love about the holidays
It can be material – or non material –
Like what activities do you love,
Who do you love
What foods do you love
And then focus on those things
When you set your priorities in advance – and stick to them
You are in way more control of what is happening
The days don’t just happen to you
You plan them
And doing this allows you to feel so much more in control of everything around you
And now listen –
When I say plan I mean plan
On a calendar and with a specific time frame
Not just a laundry list of things to do
Putting it on the calendar with a tome forces your brain to remain focused
So be clear on what the priorities are
Because you want to stick to them and honor the commitments you make to yourself
This is everything
This skill – of honoring your commitments to yourself
Totally builds the relationship you have with yourself
Which in turn allows you to know you will get it done – no matter what
Ok – next on my buffet of ideas
Food and drink
This time of year can wreck havoc on people’s brains when the scale maybe starts to tip in a direction they do not want
Remember – there is math and there is drama
The scale is the math
It’s just a neutral number
Until we add the drama of what we make it all mean
I can’t control myself
I’m terrible for eating all of that
Whatever your internal chatter is
That’s the drama
And that is optional
We think we can best ourselves up to thin
As much as I’ve noticed – that tactic does not work
So what I want to suggest is you plan in advance
Here’s the thing
Our society gets so wrapped up in how good is love
Food is joy
Drinking is what we do around the holidays to bring good cheer
But then we feel shame and guilt for overindulging
Not super joyful friends
So planning in advance could look like a couple of things
First – you can plan to only have 2 drinks let’s say and only one helping of dinner
And I encourage you to be deliberate in thinking about why you are choosing that
So maybe you write down some notes – you want to feel good the next day
You don’t want to have too many drinks and say something you might regret – whatever it is
Taking the time to think about what you want in advance and why is key to being able to stick to it
The other option is – you can intentionally say it’s all an exception
You are going to drink what you want and eat what you want
But also –
be Deliberate here
Be conscious of what you are signing up for when you do this
So maybe you write out how you will feel the next day
You might see a couple extra lbs on the scale Whatever it is for you
This just allows you to see how in control you truly are
And whatever you decide – just be sure to like your reasons why
Now the last piece I’m going to leave you with is
Don’t fight against what is
The holidays can bring up so much around families
What I mean is – maybe you think Aunt Sally shouldn’t drink so much
Or you husband should do more to help get everything set
Or your crazy sibling should know not to say those things
And when we think they should all be different we are going to be miserable
When we think they should all be different we are fighting against reality
And that my friend is an argument you will always lose
So for your sanity – let them be them
And lol – by let them – I mean let’s face it
They are
We can just let go of thinking it should all be different
What if it’s ok to be a hot mess – and fabulous at the same time?
If we stop thinking they should be different we might actually see a glimpse of something that makes them perfect – as is
Ok – if you can’t get there worth me just yet – how about at least manageable? Lol
Let’s face it –
We are all just humans
With human brains
Doing the best we can
We all want to feel loved
So let’s start with where we can control that
Right from within
I hope you take the tine this week to be very intentional on how you want to show up
It’s so much more fun when you decide to take control of the life you are living
Ok – that’s what I have for you today
Let’s circle back next week – I’ll be here for Thanksgiving – but for now – make it a great day – take care!