Failing Your Way To Success

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Ok – so we talked a lot about goals recently – setting them, forming new habits, And having a compelling reason. As we close out the month I want to talk to you about failing – my failing.

Sounds like fun right?



Hello hello hello-

How are you guys today?

I’m so excited you are back – And if it’s your first time – welcome

I’m happy you found this – And I hope you stick around Ok – so we talked a lot about goals recently – setting them, forming new habits, having a compelling reason

And as we close out the month

I want to talk to you about failing

My failing

Sounds like fun right? Lol I think this is perfect timing because I want you to think about what I am teaching you today And look at your goals and see how my fail may help you learn something along the way of getting

To your goal So let’s dive in we are taught to never fail Think about it

You must get As

Fs are bad

Or – It’s all or nothing

But you guys

That’s so limiting

Think about this

Imagine a toddler

Learning to walk

And she falls down

How do you think she actually learns to walk?

By failing at it a lot

She falls

She has to get up

And falls down again

And gets up And falls down again Get the picture?

Imagine if she was like

Well – I failed the first time

Don’t want to try that again

No – she keeps failing until she walks I have to say coaching has really changed the way I look at failing in the best way ever

And this is the gold I want to share with you here

So – if you’ve been with me you know

– since I started coaching

I’ve had some really good years in my corporate job in sales

Coaching totally changed the way I look at my work


We just finished a quarter and I did not hit my goal

Which is not really a fun place to be

But it can be an amazing opportunity for me to learn

Consider this crazy idea –

What if

You don’t have to hit every goal you set

I mean My corporate job is sales

  • I must hit my goal right?

But I want to share a new idea with you When we think we have to hit ALL of our goals we limit ourselves to picking goals we only pick the ones we feel confident we will hit

Which – let’s me honest – might be safe But not likely going to change your life the same way massive goals would Like blow your own mind goals

Think about this – in December I set an impossible goal So for me it’s a crazy amount of revenue for the year And each quarter I plan 25 fails – epic fails

  • not –

as another coach in my community says –

not half ass fails – lol

Here’s the difference Massive – or epic fails are attempts you make at something

And you don’t get the exact result you wanted

But you learn from it

Dan Sullivan talks about this

As The idea of

The strategic byproducts The gems you learn among the way

that come out of this kind of fail Which bring you that much closer to your goal with an epic fail

Because you do learn from it

But a lot of times what happens is we fail in advance – What that looks like is acting confused – Not sure where to begin

So you do nothing

Or giving up

Or lowering the goal

So this is failing

Failing in advance to be exact

And there are no strategic byproducts from this type of fail

So you don’t grow

Because usually you think – you can only do it if it’s perfect

So you limit what you are willing to do

Do you know what the worse thing is that will happen with a fail?

You feel a feeling


Really – think about it

If we do something and fail

We usually feel embarrassed

Or maybe some shame

But it’s just a feeling

And if you are willing to feel it

Think about it

What would you do with your life

Let me give you an example of an epic fail in my coaching business –

Let’s say I do a webinar MasterClass And maybe I have tech issues or freeze in the intro

The presentation might be a hot mess

And I consider it a fail

But how much have I learned in the process?

I bet I’m better at tech next time –

My intro will be on point

I will have learned a lot


Telling myself I’m not really sure how to do it

And sit in inaction

And fail in advance

And learn nothing

See the difference ?

By the way -I do have a MasterClass in the works so if you are not on my email list get I’m over there

That’s where you will get all the info first And more free content

Start by Downloading the free guide

Ok – so let’s go back to not hitting my goal this quarter I want to share some ideas with you on what the next step is if this happens to you

So maybe it’s not specifically a quarterly revenue goal

Maybe it’s a different work project

But the process – or method – is the same

Kinda like Racheal Ray – lol – I’m teaching you the method –

I think she still says that

And you add your specific ingredients

So in the past if I didn’t lake my number

I made it mean so much about myself

Clearly I’m terrible at this

Clearly I did it all wrong

Have you been here?

It’s like a loop you can spin in


You complain about all the reasons why it was your companies fault

Or your boss didn’t help you Now think about this – when we are here

Looping – complaining – blaming

We are not finding the solution for next quarter

So the first step

I like to do is ask myself how am I’m responsible

Because you guys this is how we find a solution

So for me – On this example

I see I’m responsible in the way I’ve been thinking

Shocker lol I have operated with a way of thinking Like I did running a territory similar to my old territory

But the territory doubled this year And I need to find new thinking – which will lead to new actions – for new results

If I keep with thinking the same way I did in past years

I will get the same results

Which won’t work in the new territory

So think about this for you

Have you not hit a goal?

Where does your thinking go to?

Is it how nobody in the company helped you Or how your boss doesn’t do the right thing to get you what you need

Pay attention to all of the thinking

Because when everyone else is to blame it leaves you feeling like the Victim And as the victim you feel terrible and won’t make any changes


If you ask your brain to find how you are responsible Well then you have an answer to changes you might be able to make

Now –

I want to take a pause and give you another concept to consider When working on your goals I want you to ask yourself if what you are thinking is useful

So let me give you a specific example

We had some inventory issues

I feel like every sales job this happens

So I had accounts place orders

That’s my job right

But we didn’t have the inventory to fill

So they don’t invoice Now – this is where the coaching is so helpful

And this is some of the work I do with my one on one clients who feel overwhelmed and stressed because of the job

In this moment the human brain

Will most likely go to how ridiculous it is you don’t get credit

And how you did your job

It’s not fair

And on and on

Now listen –

I’m not going to tell you to think rainbows and butterflies here I will give you did your job But are all of the thoughts that follow useful to you?

Pay attention to how they all feel.


I know – I used to think that way

But then you just spin in the stress And it takes that much longer to take action on your next goal

So instead – I just put my brain to work

How can we do things differently next quarter

What actions are we willing to take –

And what am I wiling to fail at

I especially like to ask myself

What worked

What didn’t work

And what will I do differently It’s all about learning and growing and evolving

Because the alternative is

We stay feeling stuck in a life where others are to blame

And we feel out of control of our life

And remember how I said not hitting goal is not a fun place to be

Neither is the thought of being stuck in a life you have no control over

So pay attention

What if we dropped the idea of failing as being such a horrible thing

And opened up to the idea of learning



And really living your best life

The life you want to live.

I’m in – Are you?

Let’s do it

And remember – if you have any questions about what I talk about here

Or – if there is a topic you would love to hear more about

Just send me a message

I also developed a worksheet you can download with the questions I ask in this process

I’ll have the link in the show notes

Ok – that’s what I have for you today

Let’s circle back next week

Not for now – Make it a great day Take care!

Link to download –

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