Episode 131 Year End Craziness
Episode Notes:
Join me today as I talk about ways you can close a quarter, a year, or finish a project without all the stress and overwhelm you normally feel. I’m discussing the importance of responding vs reacting, how you can find new ways to always be enough and what you can stop immediately in order to make the first steps towards more peace.
In This Episode:
- React vs Respond
- The “reality” of it all
- Year end stress
- John Acuff – Soundtracks
- Thinking on purpose
- Problems vs solutions
- Doing more of what you want
- How to have less stress
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Episode Transcript:
Hello hello hello
Welcome back friends
How is your week going?
Can you even believe it’s the end of the month?
And for us
It’s the end of our fiscal year
I should clarify
It’s the end of the fiscal year
The most important in history
Until next year..lol..
You know if you know right? Lol..
And listen
I can be as guilty as the next
Marc deals with me every end of quarter
End of year
Me and my excedrin
And I have gotten so much better since I
Learned all my tools in coaching
But I’m still human
Here is the biggest difference
I can see all of it now
In the past I was soooo in it
I just believed all the crazy as truth
As reality
But do you want to know something?
Seriously
And this is going to sound so woo woo
Reality
Is make believe
It is what
We make ourselves believe
I recently had someone tell me
Let me just tell you the reality of the situation
hahaah.
I was like … ok…
And then I spoke to someone else
Who was just as – if not more
Familiar with the situation
And they also told me the reality of the situation
Which was different
than the first “reality”
It’s so funny
Because a lot of times
It’s all perspective right?
Because my reality of what happened
Was a little different than the other stories
So think about this friend
Because so often
We get stressed out at work
About things we take so seriously
And we quickly react
Vs
Respond
And listen
I’m not saying don’t take things seriously
I’m suggesting
You take things in
And decide how you want to respond
So often
We just quickly react
And don’t take the time to really think about
What we are doing
What we want the result to be
Or how x might be effected
When we change y
And then we wonder
Why we are running around putting fires out
And why we are so stressed out
Think about this
Think about a time when you maybe
Got a prescription from a doctor
And they call you up the next day to see how you are doing
If you say something like
I’ve broken out in hives and my tongue is swollen
Well that my friends is a reaction
Negative
If you say
My energy is up
I feel great
Then your responded to the medication
Positive
It’s not what happens to us in life
It’s how we respond to it
First step in being able to respond more you ask?
Stop
Just take a minute to stop
And I share this with you
Because it has taken me some time to really get
So
Listen in ..lol..
And just hear me out
Sometimes
We have to slow down
In order to speed up
This was so foreign to me
For sooo long
And if I can help you
Understand this sooner
I will have accomplished something powerful
Let me give you an idea
I used to get so worked up as we closed any quarter
Or year
And it didn’t matter
If I was over plan
Just at plan
Shy of plan.
Stressed
And I thought
Based on what everyone else says and does
we all
Needed to be totally stressed
Let me give you a hint here
Being totally stressed
Doesn’t necesarily get you to plan
Any faster
Ask yourself if you are
Paying more attention to the problem
Or the solution
It’s funny
I used to think I had to to crazy workouts every morning
Just go go go
And this year
Im trying to do more mind management
and intentional work each morning
And you know something?
We have amazing year on year growth
In a year of covid
In an area super hard hit.
There is something too it friends
And don’t be confused
Just because you might not be so crazy
Doesn’t mean you don’t care
I care deeply
About my patients
My Doctors
My Business
But now I’m also caring
About myself
My sanity
And you know something
I can see
When I’m working with people
Who are acting soooo busy
And who are sooo stressed
They are ending up adding work for me
Because they forget what I said
Or weren’t listening
And I get it
It used to be me
And I am by no means
Saying I’m a zen Buddha master ..lol.
But – when I say
You can do your job with less stress and overwhelm
Think of the power we give to external things
And how they can determine our day
Maybe traffic is crazy
And you get to work
And you start telling everyone
How terrible your day is going
Because you got stuck in traffic
really?
You are letting traffic ruin your day?
My guess is
You know traffic happens
You get to think about how you want to respond
In advance
For anything like this
I’lll give you one more example
I remember when I first started
I thought for sure my rep
Was hazing me
He would send me out to this account
That was at minimum
Always running 2 hours late
And I would get so frustrated
Because I would be sitting around
Wasting my life away
That was my thought yes
Not a good one I can see now..lol..
And then one day I decided
Wait
If I know they are always late
Why don’t I bring some of my administrative work with me
And guess what
I became way more efficient
Vs
I know what some of you all do in those instances
You are texting your teammates
About how ridiculous it is
That our delayed
And how terrible it is
And on and on
Then
You say you never have any time
To do what you want
Well how about
You start
With ending the wasting of time
Being os negative..lol.
I know you guys
Because it was me
This is the work
Being intentional
Thinking in advance.
Coming up with solutions
And back up plans
And not running around
Like a chicken with your head cut off
When we are running around
Putting out fire drills
We are not building a strong business
There is a BIG difference
In being busy
And being productive
I actually don’t care how busy you are
I care
About the results you are getting
To me
That indicates
How well
You manage your mind
It’s so much more powerful for you
Just being able to show up
As an observer of your life
Is such an amazing step
In the right direction
So I just told you
We had great year on year growth
And that was over a year that we went from a team of 4
To 2
I feel pretty fortunate for our team
And my brain
Still want’s to tell me
You didn’t do enough
Again
In case you hear this same soundtrack
It’s like a song
you just cant
get out
of your head sometimes
right?
So annoying
Kinda like
Call me maybe
Everybody was kunfu fighting
Who let the dogs out
Can’t touch this
Ice ice baby
Or maybe that cars for kids commercial..lol..
Just over and over
I’m not enough
I didn’t do enough
Those are just soundtracks in your head
You don’t have to keep playing it
I’m reading this book Soundtracks
By Jon Acuff
So good
And in it
He suggest 3 questions when you start hearing
Your soundtrack
1. Is it true?
2. Is it helpful?
3. Is it kind?
So listen
You might have told yourself
I’m not enough
For so many years
You might say
It is true
But then go to
Is it helpful?
Likely
No
I don’t think
There is one successful person in history
That said
Yes
All I did was shame and beat myself up
And then I became successful
No
You have to love yourself all the way
And
Is it kind?
Would you ever say it to a girlfriend?
No.
So why are you saying it to yourself?
No upside friends
And remember
I don’t ever tell you
To jump to some bs thought
You don’t believe
I’m suggesting you start
Seeing it as a thought
Not
Who you are
And then
You can just start asking yourself
To find evidence
Of how you are doing enough
And a great activity to begin with
Is
At the end of each day
Just write down 3 things
Where you had success during the day
And focus on that
A lot of times
We go to bed
And think about all we didn’t do
That’s default thinking
Start thinking about 3 things
You did well
And see how that leaves you feeling
As you start your next day.
Let me know how it goes ok?
You can connect with me on the socials
Michellebourquecoaching
And I if you want help with this
Let me know
I recently changed my coaching program
So I can help more women
AND
Its so much more helpful for you
Flexibility coaching
I so love it for you
It’s totally
On your time
And you can make the change you are looking for
Just send me a dm to learn more
So easy
So fun
Ok friends
Thats what I have for you today
Let’s circle back next week
But for now
Stay healthy
And
Make it a great day
Take care!