Ep 286 Mental Health & Self Care

 In Podcast

Join me today as I talk about the importance of self care for your mental health.  This is an important topic for most women who have ideas like self care is selfish or you don’t have enough time.  Listen today as I share some ways you can begin using self care to improve your mental health.

  • Mental health and self-care with a personalized coaching package offered. 0:00
    • Personalized coaching packages to help women set boundaries, manage time, and find purpose in their jobs.
  • Self-care, boundaries, and prioritizing mental health. 4:36
    • Self-care as a way to care for others in life.
    • The importance of examining thoughts on self-care and how they spend time trying to change others.
    • Using self-acceptance as a way to evolve and reject societal norms that self-care is selfish.
    • Letting others be wrong about you is a powerful self-care strategy, allowing you to decide if it’s selfish or not.
    • Contact@michellebourquecoaching.com

 

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Episode Transcript:  Transcribed by OtterAI with minimal edits

You are listening to the it’s your time podcast and I’m your host certified life coach Michelle Arnold Bourque, and today’s episode, I’m discussing mental health and self care. Welcome to the it’s your time Podcast, the podcast, we’re busy professionals, like you get the practical solutions and support you need to gain control of your schedule. So you can strive to be the best in your career, but without the stress and overwhelm. If you’re looking to increase your energy and decrease your stress, you are in the right place. Hello, hello, hello, welcome back to the podcast friends. Hopefully, everyone is ready for a nice Memorial Day weekend. And of course, we should take a moment to reflect on why we have the freedom to even enjoy the holiday. Thank you. Okay, before I get into this episode, I want to let you know, I just put together a new summer coaching package, and I am so pumped about it and I want to share it with you here. It is a new personalized way for us to work together on whatever it is that you need the most help with, like, what are you committed to, and we will be talking about where you are now, where you want to be in three months, and then we get after it. So I just feel like it is the perfect time for people. And let me just give you an idea of some of the things that I typically work with women on things like setting boundaries, getting better around time management, so that you don’t feel so stressed and overwhelmed. I’ve done weight loss, and of course helping with jobs, whether that is to get the first one, or get the promotion. Or maybe this is probably actually the most of the folks that I work with starting to like your job again, right and trying to figure out like, where is my passion and purpose like feeling like that has been lost, it is totally my jam. We also can of course work on getting promotions, there’s so many things around that we do after all spent a lot of time in our jobs. So it makes sense that that is a big part of the coaching process. And I’ve also done drinking less so many things, right? My coaching truly is for you, I meet you where you are at and we take it from there, we figure out what do you have going on in your world that is basically driving you the most insane and this moment, right like places where you just cannot seem to figure it out on yourself. Or by yourself. That is what we do here. Or maybe it’s even someone or something that is causing you super frustration. And then we take the steps that you need in order to get what you truly want in your life helping with those relationships. And I just love it. So we will have an initial intake call to see where you’re at talking about where you want to be. And then we will develop a personalized plan. And we have a monthly call after that. And then all of the calls are customized scheduling. And I don’t have specific times, because you know, my schedule varies, and I am sure that you also have a lot going on. So we just make it work, no added pressure of having to have a set commitment in advance. We see what your schedule looks like we see what my schedule looks like, and then we get it booked. I think the best part like my most fun part of coaching is the three months it will also include Voxer and email coaching. So Voxer in case you are not familiar with it is just an easy to use app where we can communicate 24/7 literally so it doesn’t matter where your timezone is, if you have something coming up in the moment, you take it to Voxer. And within 24 hours I get back to you. It truly is like I love it when my coaches offer it. So I want to give it to you. And especially if you don’t feel like you have a lot of time to be committing to weekly calls, it is the perfect option. And the three month program is $500. So I am going to by the way, add in the 12 week course that I have on building confidence. As a bonus, I’m just so excited to have this. And the past, I’ve done more intense programs like more one on one more weekly calls, but I just feel like summer can be a bit of a change around everyone’s schedule. And this is a great opportunity to still get the benefits of coaching on the go. So if you are interested, just send me a quick email contact at Michelle Burt coaching.com. Now remember, Burke is BOURQU II. And I will of course have the info and the notes. Just let let’s keep it easy, right? Just send the email. So you’re interested in and we will get the first call set up. Let’s do this. Okay, let’s do this. Because when you get signed up, I’m telling you, you will feel so much better, less stressed and overwhelmed more in control of your life. And at the end of three months. It’s going to be an entirely different view. I just love the idea of future self work too, right? Like think about your future self. What are the steps that you need to do in order to get there? I’m going to say step one is send me that email contact@MichelleBourquecoaching.com. Okay, let’s continue with today’s episode today, I want to talk to you about a different kind of self care. And like, listen, it is Mental Health Awareness Month and your self care is an important part of your mental health. So I’m going to take it from that angle, because so many women put themselves last and have this idea that self care is selfish. And I want you to think self care is the best way that you can care for others in your life. And I want to take a stop here, I want you to think about this question. What are your current thoughts around self care? Get curious, break them down, get them out of your head, because you need to be able to see them and decide, number one, are they useful? Number two? Do they light you up? Like how do you feel when you look at those thoughts? And number three, do they feel like they can help you advance in your life? Or when you look at them? Does it make you feel like you’re stuck, ask yourself, if you’re feeling stuck, if they don’t light you up if they are not useful? What else could be true about self care? Because listen, self care does not have to be bubble baths, and massages and facials, and by all means it can be. But sometimes, it’s simply saying no to the things that you do not want to do. Sometimes, it’s having hard conversations with people in order to set boundaries. Sometimes it’s letting go of the things or people that do not support you. It really can look differently. Now the next question I have for you is how much time and energy do you spend trying to change others? Of course, thinking because it’s to their benefit, right? Like, if I’m a betting gal, I am going to say more likely than not, there are a lot of you listening and I get it, I see it, I do it. But it is such a freaking waste of time. Trying to change people who do not want to be changed is just maddening. What if you were to take that time that you spend thinking that you need to help them or change them or make them better, or take care of them in a way that only you can take care of them. And you start turning some of that internally, because here’s the thing, this is the thing that is just so crazy. A lot of times we think if we can help them or change them, then maybe they would do things differently. And by them doing the things differently, that would make us feel better. Let’s just cut to the chase and get rid of the messy middle, we start taking care of ourselves. And that does not mean at the expense of others, right? We start taking care of ourselves in ways that only we know how is best, it’s a much easier process. And it’s so much more empowering. People will change when they want to. And I will tell you, sometimes that might be never sometimes it might be after a big event has happened to them. Or sometimes it’s just us accepting this is where they are. Now. The question becomes, what do you want to think about the situation? Or the person, right? Having the capacity to do two things that are so important here, I want you to think about letting people be who they are, like believe them when they show you. And number two, letting others be wrong about you. That is a magical power of my friends, letting people be wrong about you ties back to the idea of self care being selfish. If you have that thought that self care is selfish, even question what that means, right? What is selfish? And who thinks it’s selfish? Is it society? Is it friends? Is it family? Is it you? If it’s all the external folks, be okay with them, letting them be wrong about you. Be okay with letting them be wrong about you? I might say it a third time, because I think it is so important. And it’s something that I feel like is a spiral of growth that just keeps coming back around and around and around for me like allowing others to be wrong about you is such a superpower. And guess what? It’s great news. Because you get to decide if at the end of the day, it’s you that thinks it’s selfish, right? You are the one that gets to choose to think if you want to continue thinking, here’s the thing my friend, self care is selfish like that as a sentence or as a thought is not a fact. It is a thought and there are a number of people who are intentional with ensuring that they have foundational self care routines. Those folks are not thinking it is selfish. So you get to choose. Maybe it’s something as simple as taking five minutes to pull over before you get home, to take a breath, maybe put on some great music in the car, or maybe just sit in silence. And think about how you want your evening to go. Take that moment to be intentional with what you want it to look like. Because remember, our reticular activating system is the filter by which we find things to be true. So when you’re heading home, after a crazy day, thinking that maybe the rest of the night is going to be a shit show. Guess what, that’s usually what you find. If you give yourself a couple of minutes in advance to be intentional with what you want the night to look like, not just having to react to everything, you are way more likely to have it go that way. Now, self care can also just be you getting in your workout. When you plan it right you need your health in order to continue to be the caregivers. Not only that, think about the example that you’re being for others, whether it’s your friends, or your kids, you are showing others it is okay to take care of yourself. In fact, it is imperative I would argue, it allows them to know it’s okay for them to do the same. And isn’t that really what we want more of in this world? Women supporting women, women showing other women what is possible women showing other women that it is okay to be the first one to take the first step. I am all for that. And listen, if you need help with this, I’m gonna bring it back to the three month coaching program because that is the option for you. It is about setting boundaries. It’s about self care. It’s about time management, work life integration, energy management, we do all of it. So just as a reminder, reach out to me contact@michellebourquecoaching.com

Okay friends, enjoy the weekend. Find the stuff that lights you up, do more of what you want. And we will check back here next time but for now, make it a great day. Take care Did you know you can take this work to a deeper level with me one on one. Go to Michellebourquecoaching.com and click on get started to begin

 

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