Ep 225 The Knowledge Is Power Lie

Join me today as I discuss how “knowledge is power” is sometimes a lie we tell ourselves.  This came up on a recent consult call and I see so many women looking to external sources for the “right” answer.  Looking outside yourself can keep you stuck if you are not making decisions, taking action, learning, and moving to the next step.  Listen now as I talk about why this often holds you back from your biggest goals and what you can start doing today to change it.

In This Episode:

• How allowing others to decide the best advice keeps you stuck
• The importance of making decisions
• Being willing to fail, learn, and move on
• Knowing when you have enough information to make a choice 
• Having your own back
• Spirals of growth 
• Knowing your worth in your career
• www.michellebourquecoaching.com/connect

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Episode Transcript: Transcribed by OtterAI with minimal edits.

You are listening to the it’s your time podcast and I’m your host certified life coach Michelle Arnold Bourque. In today’s episode I’m discussing the Knowledge is power lie.

Welcome to the Its Your Time Podcast, the podcast. We’re busy professionals like you get the practical solutions and support you need to gain control of your schedule. So you can strive to be the best in your career, but without the stress and overwhelm. If you’re looking to increase your energy and decrease your stress, you are in the right place.

Michelle Bourque 0:38 Hello, hello, hello. Welcome back to the podcast friends what is going on in your world? It has been so much fun. I’ve recently been hearing from more and more of you and it just delights me when you reach out. So if you are interested, please be sure to check me out on the socials at Michelle Bourque coaching. I’m also on LinkedIn in Michelle Arnold Bourque, let’s connect for sure. Okay, let’s also jump into today’s topic because I want to talk about the idea of how knowledge is power is a lie. And it came up on a recent concept call where I was talking to someone interested in getting into the device industry. And one of the things that she wanted was advice on what actions to take, because she was having conflicting messages on what was the right thing to do. As she reached out to multiple folks, this happens in so many areas of our lives. In fact, the next day, I was coaching a friend on a decision that she was making. And there was a similar thought process, really having concern for what one party involved might think. And it’s a great topic to get into. As always, I will use examples that I have, but I know that you have your own. So listen, with the filter that will help you in your specific situation. The thing is, we often look to others for the quote unquote, right information. But the truth is, it might be right for them, and not so much for you. And we tell ourselves Knowledge is power. And I believe that can often leave you feeling stuck. Because how you do one thing is how you do everything. So when you’re looking to everybody else for your decision making process, you are going to be in a spiral. And the question really becomes how do you know when you have enough knowledge to make the decision. And knowledge just stored up in your head isn’t power, it’s when you take action on the knowledge. And here’s the kink in the process, we still look to the external sources, not only for the knowledge, but then for the validation that we are doing correctly, that we have made the right decision that we are successful or worthy. And if they don’t agree, whoever they are in your world, right, because it might be strangers that you’re reaching out to for networking, and might be family members, it might be friends, but whoever they are, that you believe knows better than you, when they don’t agree, then you make it mean you are either not doing it correctly, or you do not deserve the opportunity, or you’re not worthy. And when you think they will think I’m doing it wrong. A lot of times you feel anxious, or worried, and you don’t do anything at all. And guess what the result is you aren’t doing anything. So of course it’s the wrong answer. And it’s not the wrong answer. Because you have done anything wrong. It is the wrong answer, because you are thinking that somebody else knows better than you. And there’s nothing for you to even assess, right? If we’re really looking at what’s going on. How do you actually know what is right and what is wrong? I want to suggest that knowledge is power. When you take action and you take action when you believe in yourself. When you trust that no matter what decision you make, you will speak to yourself in a kind way. The thing is, we look to these others to deem us successful, and we don’t even know what success means to us. So question that for you. What does success mean? It’s different for everyone. And not only is it different for everyone, it could be different for you as you grow and evolve. And I see this with reps who become moms. The idea that success as a rep early on was one thing. And now being a mom as a rep looks different Guess what? That’s okay. You get to change your mind as to what success means for you this year, this month, this week, today, and please don’t base it on what others tell you. I will share an example with you. When I started this job, I was told it was not a mom job. And I have to tell you, I believed that story. And I didn’t have some of the hard conversations that I needed to when we were trying to have kids conversations, like as simple as asking for time off from medical appointments. Because I was thinking, if I want to be successful, I have to do this job. And I even let the thought go deeper. Because remember, our reticular activating system always wants to find evidence for what we believe to be true. So I found additional evidence as to why this would be true for me, because we didn’t have any family around to help us if we did have kids. That is how our reticular activating system is, it will find evidence for what we believe to be true. So be sure that you have some very useful sentences as to what you want success to look like for you. Because then you will find more evidence for it. And before having these tools. I had lots of thinking, or beliefs, or misbeliefs, around this job, and what a good mom was not super useful. So get aware, get curious, what are your thoughts? This is why I love teaching these tools. And these tools work at any level. And I think it’s especially fun when someone new to a career industry is learning about it. Because listen, the more people that we can get earlier in life, the better in my opinion. And it’s funny a few months ago, I was at a conference and they were talking about women’s empowerment. And an older woman raised her hand older than me, I would like to note and said, That’s not really a problem for me. I don’t care what everybody thinks to which the presenters said, Yes, we get it, you’re 70 We’re trying to get people, we young women earlier in life to know that as well. And it’s so true. Let’s not wait until a midlife crisis to start doing more of what you want to start believing in yourself to start defining what success is for you. What if belief in yourself is where the power is at. Guess what, that’s exactly where it’s at. Because even if you quote unquote, fail, and the action that you’re taking, you know, you always have your own back. And I want to also just take a moment to say that you get to define what failure means. And so often we make it mean that we are terrible. It can also simply mean that you did not meet the expected results. And now you learn, move on and make the next decision, take action, learn, move on, and make the next decision. And guess what, back to that original question of what should I do? Whose advice should I listen to what will work you know, when you know what works for you, once you actually start doing the things, the belief itself is built on the tools that we talked about in my six month program, you need to have this this is an overarching umbrella to so much of what we do. And I love teaching and coaching on brain motivation, clarity, awareness on how your thoughts are creating your results, the importance of emotions, cutting back and perfectionistic thinking that holds you back, being willing to fail in an effort to learn and grow. Time management, habit formation, goal setting, reducing people pleasing, there is so much we can do under this umbrella. And I love to have fun along the way. It’s all of the goodness that you need specific to what you come here with. As I will note you navigate moving to the next level. The interesting thing is I see all levels of women in this worthiness seeking spiral. And what I mean is, you might look to others for your level of worthiness in the process of getting a job. But I also have clients that believe their sales numbers determine their level of worthiness or a promotion. Heck, we do it with numbers on a scale as well. And for me, at one point back to my example, I made not being a mom a determination of my worthiness. It’s all the spirals of growth that we go through, and that’s okay. But here’s the real truth. There is no worthiness fairy that ascends from the heavens. and tells you that you have arrived. I am telling you right now, you are already here. And it’s important to see because once you have the awareness around all of it, then you’re able to decide if you want to make the changes. And that’s the beauty of the agency that we have in our lives. We get to decide now, what is the next step for you? And if you are ready to build that belief in yourself and make all the changes, let’s get on a transformational call. You will leave with a different take on what you come to the call with. So Michelle Bourque 10:38 just go to MichelleBourquecoaching.com/connect and remember Bourque is B OURQUE, we will talk about where you are at, see if the six month program is a fit. And just take it from there. There’s no obligation again, just get started by heading to MichelleBourquecoaching.com/Connect. Okay, friends, that’s what I have for you today. Take what works leave what doesn’t and let’s meet back here next week for another opportunity for transformation. Make it a great day. Take care Michelle Bourque 11:18 Did you know you can take this work to a deeper level with me one on one, go to Michellebourquecoaching.com and click on get started to begin