Ep 211 Making Better Decisions
Join me today as I discuss making better decisions.
Making better decisions leads to getting better results in your life. Making better decisions may also open up new opportunities, constrain other options, and have you learn along the way.
Having the skill of making better, more powerful decisions, is one of the greatest assets you have in creating the life you really want.
In This Episode:
- Recent decisions around business trips
- Asking better questions
- Deciding in advace
- Learning from results and deciding again
- Why we don’t make decisions
- Deciding as a female in a male dominated industry
- The importance of having your own back along the way
- Work with me: www.michellebourquecoaching.com/connect
Episode Transcript: Transcribed by OtterAi with minimal edits
Michelle Bourque 0:01 You are listening to the richer time podcast and I’m your host certified life coach Michelle Arnold Bourque, and today’s episode I’m discussing making better decisions.
0:12 Welcome to the richer time Podcast, Michelle Bourque 0:14 the podcast, we’re busy professionals, like you get the practical solutions and support you need to gain control of your schedule. So you can strive to be the best in your career, but without the stress and overwhelm. If you’re looking to increase your energy and decrease your stress, you are in the right place. Michelle Bourque
0:36 Hello, hello, hello, welcome back to the podcast friends what is going on in your world, I have been back to traveling quite a bit. In fact, I had an amazing opportunity to combine a business coaching workshop with a trip for my corporate job, and was able to really dig into learning some new tools to share with you and part of the week and then working on helping a doctor set up a cancer pain program at his hospital. And I’m writing this before I land to begin the meetings, and I want to share something with you, I am deciding in advance that both are going to be amazing. Did you know that you can do that you can decide in advance about something you have going on. It’s one of the tools that we go in depth on in my private coaching program. And I’m going to talk about it here today. But before we get too far into the episode, I want to remind you speaking of the coaching program that I’m offering something that I’ve never done before, for people who want to join me, especially medical device reps who are just feeling so overwhelmed women, I’m talking to you and want to be able to do this job, maybe not in the same way that the guys are doing it. Now normally the program is 12 weeks. But if you sign up now, at the release of this podcast, it is the second week in November, I’m adding two extra months so that you can get started. This program really is for you. If you’re feeling overwhelmed from work, it seems like you never have a break your to do list just keeps multiplying. Kind of like you know Gremlins back in the day. Do you know about the Gremlins folks? Or am I aging myself here, you know what I mean? You feel like you are running around like a chicken with your head cut off. And the to do list never seems to get finished. And you just want to have a minute to yourself. When we do the one on one work, you leave knowing the exact things that need to be done in order to feel proud at the end of the day and not feel guilty about the things that you didn’t get done. So super simple. Just go to Michellebouruqecoaching.com/connect, sign up for a free call, we just want to make sure it’s a great fit, and then we get going.
Okay, speaking of getting going, let’s hop into the episode. And I’m talking about making better decisions. Now. I want to take a moment to pause to also just remind you that you are always making decisions. And sometimes we don’t even realize it. We think that we are just victims to all of the external craziness. But the truth is, we are always choosing. I mean, listen, I can get into that ice cream aisle and look around for God knows how long feel very overwhelmed because I just can’t seem to decide and leave. Except I did make a decision in that moment. I decided to not get any. So instead of saying I just don’t know I have to leave there’s too much to choose from, I can instead decided to own that I choose to not have any. It’s way more empowering to own your decisions. So how do you make powerful decisions you might be asking, or how do you make better decisions? Well, a lot of times powerful or better decisions, I will interchange those two words powerful and better. They come from powerful questions. And a lot of times we ask ourselves terrible questions, things like why can I never figure this out? Why is this so hard? Why are my parents so crazy? That’s not a question I ask of course. Just you know, in theory, I hear folks might ask that question. Or maybe it’s more along the lines of how come I can’t ever lose weight? Think about the answers that come from any of those questions. Are they useful? Not usually, remember, our brain is like a heat seeking device on a mission to find the answers for you. And keep in mind, it has a negative bias, it is a negative default. And it is simply the way the reptilian brain is designed. So if you ask something like, why can I never lose weight? Or why can I never get my calendar straight? Or why can I not seem to get that account to do what I want, you will find all of the negative answers, usually leaving you feeling terrible, and most likely not taking great action towards change. Deciding to not take action is usually what happens because you’re not feeling too motivated. Instead, I want you to consider asking better questions, asking more powerful questions, and then decide when you get those answers what you want. Now, some powerful questions might be more like, what are the next three steps I can take to move towards my goal? Or how do I want to think and feel about this situation? That one is gold. So often, we react to external events. And we think that we don’t have any control over anything that’s going on. We always control what we want to think and feel about the situation. So ask yourself on purpose, what that is, you can also ask something along the lines of how can I create what I want? How could I make scheduling more fun? What is perfect about this? Can you see the difference? better, more powerful questions, get you more useful answers. And from there, you decide. So much of the default thinking that we have is unconscious? And if you’re not sure, there is a simple way to figure it out, answer the following questions daily. What am I thinking? Why am I choosing this? Why am I deciding to think this? How do I want to feel? What do I need to think in order to feel that way? You are way more powerful than you realize. Now, let me just say a lot of times, we’re afraid to make decisions because we’re afraid of getting wrong. This happens so much with women. I mean, I still think it’s sometimes too But who is it decides if it is right or wrong. A lot of us have been conditioned and socialized to believe that external folks decide for us. But the truth is, there is no external panel of life experts that decide if our decisions for our lives are right or wrong. I will tell you, I caught myself this morning thinking that I should probably reach out to the Google gods and they would tell me the right answer. If I can wear a blue blazer with black pants. Listen, as my past or current self, I will not claim to be any sort of fashionista. But who knows? Maybe my future self has it, you know, and her and we’ll get it together. But the truth is, I see people out Annabelle in their PJs these days, right? So pretty sure, I can just decide myself if I think the black and the blue look works. The point is, you get to decide if your decisions are right or wrong. You can really, you have the option to decide that no matter what you will not beat yourself up. If you make a decision that after the fact the results come in and you think
Michelle Bourque 9:27 I may have been able to make a different decision. And maybe a different decision would have yielded different results may be more in line with what I was looking for. I think a lot of us are afraid of this. We’re afraid to make the decisions because of how we speak to ourselves after we make it. I promise you know great feats have been one after beating ourselves up. Many of us have tried this for years. Trust me. You You can decide to drop that part. And you can decide in advance that no matter what, you will always have your own back and you will learn from it and you will move on, I am telling you, if you simply drop the layer of judgment, you will move so much faster in your life, and get to the results that you are most looking for. Think of how many decisions you would make and where you might be. As far as having new results in your life if you weren’t afraid of whatever you think will happen, if you quote unquote, make the wrong decision. Again, we work on this so much more specifically, with the one on one coaching program. But I want to share another tip with you here, deciding in advance what I talked about earlier. So much fun. Like I said, I am deciding in advance that I have all of these meetings this week, and I am going to learn so much. I am going to have an amazing time networking with others, I’m going to expand what I am able to offer to you here from a coaching perspective. And I’m going to be able to help this doctor get what he needs to grow the cancer pain program, which will help more patients. And you know what, by deciding that my brain is going to find all of the evidence for these things while I am here. Now, on the flip side, and I want you to think about this for yourself. And certain situations. On the flip side, the default option often looks more like I’m not sure how this is going to go. I hope I like all of the new people that I’m going to meet these classes better be worth the amount of money I paid for them. I am really going to miss mark and the pup, they are probably really going to miss me. I hope that they’re both Okay, while I’m gone. That might sound like a nice thought. I hope they’re both okay while I’m gone. But it can be insidious and anxiety ridden because it almost presupposes that they need me in order to be okay. No, I decide. You decide, right, maybe it’s not your pup, maybe it’s your kids, maybe it’s your partner, you can decide that everything and everyone is going to be just fine. If you need to go out of town for a couple of days, see how different all of the decisions are, how each produces a different feeling. And then how each feeling will drive you to take different actions, which will yield different results. Think about this, if I am going in to these meetings in advance. Thinking about all I’m going to learn how I’m going to help my coaching clients how I’m going to help my doctors how I’m going to help my patients. And I am feeling so good that mark and the pup are taken care of and they are all fine. That is definitely going to produce different results than if I just go to the meeting and worry about what I might be missing in the field or what I might be missing with Marc in the pop. Totally different results. Totally different decisions that can be made in advance. I want you to think about maybe one decision that you’re putting off and ask yourself why? What if it all worked out better than you even imagined? Be intentional here, you will appreciate what you’re able to create so much more when you do it with intention. Remember, we go more in depth with this in the coaching program, plus so much more. And I want you if you are thinking that you’re ready, even if you’re not ready, if you’re just thinking that you’re ready to hop on a free call, and I promise you that you will leave with at least one golden nugget that could really make such a difference. You have control over your time. You get to do more of what you want in a way that works for you, ladies, not the way the guys do it. And you do not have to feel guilty for not getting everything off of your list checked every single night. The truth is not everything on that list needs to be done. What needs to be done is you need to prioritize the needle movers in order to make the changes in your life and to really create more of the results that you most desire that’s what I want for you. Okay friends got a little bit of a rant there for a moment right? That’s what I have for you today. Let’s circle back next week but for now, make it a great day take care Michelle Bourque 15:20 Did you know you can take this work to a deeper level with me one on one, go to Michellebourquecoaching.com and click on get started to begin