Ep 166 Who You Are Being in 2022
Join me today as I talk about the importance of who you are being and why – especially as you enter the new year. Most resolutions don’t last and I discuss why this is, what you can do about it, and how to best set yourself up for success. I also touch upon the importance of knowing what you want to let go of as we close out this year. Listen today and get our list started – so many great things are in store for 2022.
In This Episode:
- Why resolutions don’t last
- Knowing who you are being as you evolve
- Being your future self
- The importance of understanding your why for any new goal
- Release of 2021
- Free download of top 10 podcasts from 2021 – www.michellebourquecoaching.com/podcast2021
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Episode Transcript:
Hello, hello, hello, welcome back to the podcast friends, our last podcast of 2021. I am so excited to share this with you today, I was actually putting together the top downloaded podcast of 2021. And the one that came in as number one was, who you are being and why now that was from January of last year. And I have to tell you, it is perfect to check out before you start making resolutions for 2022. And I want to use it today as a replay for you because it’s so important to know you do not normally just make your resolution and then wake up on January 1 and your life is entirely different. This is why most resolutions do not work. Think about the gyms right? I know when we used to go. They were packed in January. But by the time March rolled around place was all years. And this podcast talks about why that happens. And I also want you to consider this podcast to be timeless in a way because it doesn’t have to be something that you consider just around New Years. It’s really the tools and the concepts that you want to use when you’re changing any new habit or going for any new goal. It does not matter if you’re talking New Year’s Eve, or Fourth of July, right? It’s really for any goal or habit that you’re working on at any moment. And I will tell you, the evolution does not stop well. As long as you’re doing the work, right. And I laugh because in the podcast that you’re going to be listening to I talk about how I started this podcast, and Mark’s closet. And now here we are, I have my setup in the office, Mark does the editing. And it’s just so fun to look at how we’ve changed who we are being as we continue to build the business, which you will also hear me talk about in the podcast, the idea of how it is so important to understand who you are being as you start reaching for your new goals. And let me tell you, that addition of the business and the partnership also changes who we are being right. It’s so fascinating. And I’ll share a funny story with you. You know, sometimes I like to share these tools with Mark as well. And as I like to think about it, it’s for his benefit. But the other night we were talking and I asked him, Well, what do you think your inner voice is saying? I have no idea why I asked him that you guys, to which he replied, it’s saying shut the eff out. Why would you ask me that I’m a dude. And I don’t think like that. So as we talk about who we’re being and things changing, also, let’s just keep it real. These are the things that go on in the Burke household, which makes it all so fun. And I want to add one more thing before you start listening to the podcast for you to consider as you’re closing out the year. Now, if you’re anything like me, you enjoy a good list. So today, before you get too crazy and all your New Year’s goals and resolutions, I also want you to consider a list of things that you are no longer going to be doing or being what do you want to release from this year? What do you want to remove this year? Now it could be thoughts or releasing it could be feelings such as doubt. It could be old habits, bad habits. It could be physical items in your home or your office that you are literally removing just a little Marie Kondo cleaning for your brain what no longer brings you joy. What is taking mental space and energy that no longer serves you. Write it down, release it. You can even burn the sheet of paper once you have it complete and fully release all of it again, what no longer brings you joy. Let it go. And before you listen to the full episode, I also just want to give you a heads up that I’ve put together a list of the top 10 podcast for you. It’s in one easy spot, you can just go to Michelle Bourque coaching.com, forward slash podcast 2021. And the topics range from a conversation we had with emotional expert, Rhonda Farr to vulnerability to change to being bold, unconditional love. It’s just a great synopsis of the tools that we talk about here. And speaking of the tools that we have here, I also want you to save the date. We’ll talk more about this next week, but January 8, I’ll be doing a free class on finding your purpose and 2022. That will be at 10am. Eastern, so again, save the day, January 8 10am. Eastern. And if you head to Michelle Bourque coaching comm forward slash podcast 2021. That’s where you’ll get the download, you will be added to the email list. So you will get all of the info on the class there. Okay, without further ado, enjoy the podcast. You are listening to the it’s your time podcast, and I’m your host certified life coach Michelle Arnold Burke, and today’s episode, I’m discussing who you are being and why. Welcome to the richer time Podcast, the podcast where busy professionals like you get the practical solutions and support you need to gain control of your schedule. So you can strive to be the best in your career, but without the stress and overwhelm. If you’re looking to increase your energy and decrease your stress, you are in the right place. Hello, hello. Hello. Welcome back to the podcast friends, how is everyone doing? Happy New Year, hope everyone enjoyed and was safe. I did a lot of reflecting over the past couple of weeks. And can you guys believe we are heading into our third year here together? How fun is that? I was thinking back to when I first started. And I was literally in my husband’s closet, recording this which side note I think is a hot mess. But it worked back in the day. And back then I was also talking more about cutting back on wine. But as I worked with more people, what I realized was that their true issues were issues more around like escaping, feeling anxious, or not wanting to feel bored, or feeling so overwhelmed at the end of every day that the wine was really the only way to relax. And that’s when I changed the podcast, to it’s your time what you’re listening to today. And really now focus more on teaching the concepts and the tools that allow you to be your amazing self at work, and be able to do more of what you want in life without the stress and the overwhelm and the anxiety. So good. And side note, I no longer record, the podcast and my husband’s closet, right lots of growth year friends. And then I think back and I realize that I am being a different person this year than I was back then. And that’s what I really want to talk to you about today. So many people make resolutions this time of year, right? Like work out more, eat cleaner, maybe read more. Think about whatever that is for you. Or maybe you don’t really make resolutions. But you do have some changes that you want to make in your life or new habits that you want to implement. Think about what that is for you. And I want you to think about who you are being James clear talks about this in his book atomic habits when you want to implement new habits. And for the purpose of this podcast, I’ll be interchange eing resolutions and habits because I feel like sometimes the pretty close to the same. It’s more than starting a new habit. Here’s what I mean. Are you someone who wants to read more books or Are you being a reader? Do you want to work on eating better? Or are you being a person who eats clean? Do you want to work out more? Or are you being an athlete? Which by the way, you can be considered an athlete and not be winning the gold medal for the Olympics? But can you see the difference between what you want to do? So looking at just taking the actions? Or are you showing up being that person who already lives in a life with those habits? And are you just on automatic pilot? So first, take a moment to think about why do you even want these new habits? Or are you making these resolutions? What is your reason? And you want to make sure it’s really compelling. So let’s say you want to work out more, you want to be an athlete, why? Most people’s initial response is something along the lines of to be healthy. And that sounds lovely, right? But when you wake up at 4am, to go work out, and it’s cold, and it’s dark, and you were up late the night before and you are tired, your brain will likely tell you, you can be healthy tomorrow, just hit snooze, right. But think about it. I think the number is like 92% of people do not keep their resolutions. And this makes total sense, right? Because it can be hard to start a new habit. So you really need to have a compelling reason. Here’s what you can do to help when you come up with that first response. So let’s say to be healthy, ask yourself why? Why do you want to be healthy? Get that answer? And then ask yourself why? Again, and maybe even why again. So that might come down to you want to be healthy, so you feel more energized. So you can do more with your kids. So you can show them an example of what’s possible. See the difference between I want to be healthy. And I want to show my kids what’s possible. Or listen, if you don’t have kids like me, maybe it’s to be an example to your nieces or coworkers or to yourself, it doesn’t matter what my reason might be. It matters what your compelling reason is. And it has to be more compelling than what your current reason is for not being that person or not doing that habit. That is everything. Be sure it’s more compelling than whatever reason you’re holding on to today, that is not allowing you to move forward. And then the next question is, think about how you think you will feel once you accomplish that goal, or resolution? Do you think you’ll be happy? Or do you think you’ll feel successful or accomplished? The trick is, you have to feel that you have to be that today. Think about this, think about how you feel when you think something like I want to feel happy, it comes from lack. It’s saying you aren’t happy. And let’s say you’re trying to let’s say for this example, we say lose weight, I want to lose weight, and then I’ll be happy. Usually, if you’re not happy now, in order to feel happy, you might grab a cookie, or an extra glass of wine, and then you just continue the cycle of wanting to be happy. What I’m suggesting is you start being happy. Now. You start being that person. Now, that person that is at that ideal weight. What does she do today? What does she stopped doing? Maybe there are habits that you actually need to break in order to be her. And it’s an important shift in creating any result that you want. And I use some of the obvious ones, especially this time of year losing weight or working out so that more people can relate to it. But it’s true for any new result that you want. So let’s say you want to get a promotion. Think about how you would be if you were already in that position, like what decisions would you make? What would you not be doing, and start being all of that. Now, it’s so fun. You believe it before you see it. And that’s how you create ate it. And I want to share another tip that clear talks about in his book, which I highly recommend if you’re into any of this. Again, the title is atomic habits. And I did a podcast reviewing the book last year, I think it was put it in the show notes. And the last time I checked, it was the top downloaded episode. So you may want to check that out. So clear also talks about the need to make your new habit easy. So let’s go back to the first example. Let’s say you want to work out more in the morning, have your clothes and your sneakers all lined up in the morning, plan your workout the night before, and then stack it on a habit that you already have. So maybe you currently have a habit of getting up and having coffee I plan that as soon as you are done with your coffee, you start working out. Remember, our brain wants to be easy and efficient. So if you can make it easy for your brain, you are way more likely to do it versus having to get up find your clothes. Think about what you want to do decide when you will fit it in. See the difference. That mindset just gives your brain so many opportunities to talk yourself out of it. You really want to set yourself up for success and have your own back. honor the commitments that you’re making to yourself like you do to any of your clients accounts, or the CEO of your job, you my friend or the CEO of your life. So be that person. Enjoy it all now today, because it really is all we currently have today. And remember, if you want to join me doing this work, I just created a new free guide for you to download on strategies to enjoy more of your life. Super simple, just go to Michelle Bourque coaching comm forward slash guide and with that, that’s what I have for you today. Let’s circle back next week but for now, stay healthy and make it a great day. Take care