Ep 149 Success and Self Clarity

 

Join me today as I discuss how we determine success and why it’s important to have clarity for yourself.  If we want to make changes in our lives we need to know what that means for us.  If we want to be successful we need to know what determines that.  Listen today to learn more.

In This Episode:

• My recent mind management work
• Wanting to like your job
• How the numbers on the scale, on the sale rankings and on the Peloton leaderboard are all neutral
• Brain data dump and how it can help start your day
• Clarity questions
• How you spend your time vs what is important to you
• Work with me – contact@michellebourquecoaching.com
• Online course – www.michellebourquecoaching.com/course 

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Episode Transcript:

Michelle Bourque 0:01 You are listening to the it’s your time podcast and I’m your host certified life coach Michelle Arnold Bourque. And today’s episode I’m discussing success and self clarity. Welcome to the it’s your time podcast, the podcast where busy professionals like you get the practical solutions and support you need to gain control of your schedule. So you can strive to be the best in your career, but without the stress and overwhelm. If you’re looking to increase your energy and decrease your stress, you are in the right place. Hello, hello. Hello. Welcome back to the podcast friends. How are you today? I have to tell you, I am feeling pretty good. And I will tell you the past couple of weeks have been questionable, shall I say on some days. And I think I mentioned how everyone quit on the team we are rebuilding. And that’s amazing. And it’s funny because I keep having some colleagues, some competitive reps, some doctors asking me, when are you going to jump ship, when we just give up and sometimes I think they might have a point. But then I know. And I freakin mean this from the bottom of my heart. The reason I am here is the work on my mind. And that’s what I want to talk to you about today about the idea of what we call success, and also clarity around yourself. And not everyone is willing to do that work on their minds, because it means you have to take full responsibility for all the stuff. And I have seen this more than ever in the last few weeks. Because I will tell you, there have been days recently when I was like, What in the actual hell am I doing. And then I get to work on my mind because I know if I get in that victim mode, and this is for you guys, if you get in the victim mode, we lose all of our power. And I know that my mind is key. Well, let me also give a little credit where credit is due, I have a pretty great husband who just also lets me vent and doesn’t try to solve anything. After 20 something years, I think he knows I’m not looking for answers, even on the days, when I may or may not have suggested that we just empty the 401 Ks and move to the ocean. But I do the work. And he just lets me be. And in addition to doing the work and having somewhere to vent right, I also have great coaches that I work with, and friends in my coaching community. And they call me out. And I’m sharing this. So you all know, this work is not like, okay, I’ve arrived. It’s a work in progress. We all have human brains. And when I talk to clients, and I can hear the desperation in their voices and wanting to like their job, but just being so frustrated and so overwhelmed, because they can’t seem to either have time to themselves, or hit the numbers that they want to hit or be able to leave work at the door because it just never turns off. When I hear that I know, this is the work for me to be sharing with you. And I promise you, the job does not determine your success. You are not your number. And the job will never turn off unless you learn the ways to turn it off for yourself. And when we are all in the mindset that it’s because of the job, then everything goes to hell. You know, they say the universe has your back. Right. And for me, I think this last year last few months especially has really been an opportunity for the universe to serve me up this exact work and to be able to continue serving it up to you because it’s been a test. But we all get to decide if we want to keep managing our mind around the things that we think are creating all of the quote unquote negative in our lives. For me, the people quitting more competition in the market inventory issues. You know, we all have something right. How do we want to manage our mind around that or do we want to find a new opportunity to manage our mind around? Notice friend, there is always something for us to manage our mind around. There will always be challenges. There will always be times When we have hard times, but that doesn’t mean that that is the road ahead. It doesn’t mean that you have to keep making your decisions based on your current circumstance. Here’s the thing. You take your mind with you, wherever you go. And you can change it now and create different results in your life. And when you do that, you know, you are the one in charge. And that’s when you’re able to find new solutions, because victim mentality is so debilitating when we are victims. That means there’s a villain, right? So let’s use this example, the job. When we are victims to our job, we feel helpless. And when we feel helpless, we tend to retreat. But when you can see how powerful you are, you can make the changes and even faster than you know, and I know it sounds a little woowoo. But when you align your mind in the right frequency, you can see some pretty amazing changes quickly. It’s when you start to gain clarity on what is important and on what you want to focus on that you start seeing different results. And I know when I start to think things like the competition has more people in the field, I’m doing things that aren’t revenue generating because we don’t have anyone, this process of helping these patients through the system is taking longer than it should. Which side note. It’s funny, right? How long quote unquote, should it take. There’s not like a book from the universe that says it should take x number of days for you. And you are way behind Michelle, but my brain likes to tell me that sometimes, right? But when I’m in that mindset, I assure you things are not clicking in many aspects of my life. But when I can empty all that bs out of my brain, and I have talked to you about this in the past, you do a data dump of your brain. It’s as simple as taking five to 10 minutes each day. And I like to do it in the morning. And just free right? What is going on in your brain? the good, the bad, the ugly, then you can take a look at it and decide, is this really going to be useful for me to think today? And if it is great, continue thinking it. Usually though, it’s our default brain just serving us up negativity? What do you want to think, on purpose? What are some of the thoughts? That might be the opposite possibility of what you are currently thinking? And is that something that you’re able to believe? And if yes, start practicing that. You need to gain clarity on what is important to you in order to take the actions and that direction versus thinking about all the things that are not going right for you or that you don’t want to be happening? Just get still for a little bit and ask yourself some clarity questions. How do you want to serve? How do you want to show up in your relationships? How do you want to define success? Where are you doing great things that you can actually continue to do more of? And be sure to ask yourself in the timeframe of in this moment, because clarity on all of that might change down the road, right? So ask yourself in this time frame, not in 20 years. Today, how do you want to serve today? How do you want to show up? Got it. And the deeper you dive into what all of that looks like for you, the more you’re able to gain clarity, then the closer you get to creating that life. And the other thing that helps me for sure is when I work with my coach, right? And let me just take a moment and say for all of you who are considering working with a coach, you know, I would love that to be me. And you know, you can always send me an email contact at Michelle Burke coaching or just send me a DM on the socials, Instagram, and Facebook, Michelle Burke coaching, and we can connect but let me share something with you. In case you are someone who has considered but not yet committed, I will tell you, I have been in some sort of coaching relationship since 2017. And you know what that means? I had to take a minute and stop thinking about all of the external things. I had to take them in it. And you know, it’s kind of a cliche quote, that quote you have to bet on yourself, but I had to take a minute and really bet on myself. You have to be willing to bet on yourself when you enter into a coaching relationship. You have to be willing to invest your time, you have to be willing to invest your money. And it can be scary. Because for so long, we have thought it is the external that determines our success. We have thought it’s the job. We think that the numbers determine our success or our accolades from others, we have this thought. And we have been socialized to believe for a long time that the external circumstances create our life. And then when the numbers are down, when you seem to be doing it all on your own, we tell ourselves these crazy stories about how terrible we are, and then we feel terrible. And then maybe we don’t always show up the way that we want. Maybe that is, you’re not showing up at work the way you want. Or maybe more often, I see. It’s that you’re not showing up with your family and friends the way that you want, and we give the job, either all of the credit or the blame, right. And we don’t see that it is within ourselves that the change exists. The job is not the determining factor. It’s your mindset. A number is neutral. And I don’t care if you’re looking to lose weight. I don’t care if it’s where you rank in your sales numbers. And I don’t even care if it’s the place where you are on the peloton leaderboard. Of course, you know, I had to get a little peloton reference in there, right. But in all seriousness, no matter where the number is coming from, it is neutral. It is a story that you tell about how you are no longer successful. That’s where the work is. That’s what we need to change. And when we are in it, when we are telling ourselves the stories and I know because I am still in it sometimes, right? We can’t always see the other possibilities. And that’s where a coach comes into play, to question at all to show you what your brain has going on to show you there are different possibilities, to allow you the opportunity to see your own greatness. I know you’re great. And I have enough belief in you that you can even borrow it if you want, right? The money that we invest in coaching, pays dividends. And what I mean is, coaching has been one of the best return on investments that I’ve ever made. And it’s not just because I see the difference in my career, like from leadership positions, or growth opportunities or changes in productivity. I’ve talked about having some of the highest billing revenue years, I’ve had some of my highest income earning years. But I’ve also touched more lives than ever. And it started with my first investment. And it was scary as all get up. It wasn’t cheap. But looking back how my life has changed. It has been so worth it. And I continue to invest because I know, it’s not just the money part. Which by the way, I happen to enjoy making more money, right. But it’s also the relationships that change with myself with loved ones with work, all of it being able to see clients lives change. It’s life changing. And y’all know how I love to think about the ripple effects. So I can think about the clients, I touched their lives. And then I think about whose lives do they touch, and I get to share it here with you all for free. And when you’re ready to go deeper, we get to do it one on one. It’s like compounding interest if you ask me. So let me share one other activity that you can try. As a recap, the first one. And if you only do one from this podcast, I so encourage you to take a look at what is going on in your brain with that data dump. Basically, it’s just a thinking download, get it all out on paper. And you know, a lot of times we don’t even realize what’s going on in there until we actually get it on paper and can see it. And then next answer those clarity questions that I talked about. And then the last part of this is to record what you actually did in the last 24 hours. And compare that to what you have listed as your clarity questions that have been answered. Make sense? So get your clarity questions all set, and then reflect back. How did you spend your last 24 hours? Are they in alignment? Do they match up? And if not, it’s time to get working on making those changes. And listen, if you’re not ready for one on one coaching, remember I always have the online course. It goes over many of the tools that I use with my clients. It’s self paced, it’s online, you have lifetime access. You get all sorts of modules for mindset around business, personal life, there’s bonuses in there, it’s actually a lot of fun. If you ask me. You can just head to Michelle Bourque coaching comm forward slash course and get the info there. Okay friends, what is determining your success today? Get clear on that. And that’s what I have for you today. Let’s circle back next week but for now stay safe and make it a great day. Take care. Did you know you can take this work to a deeper level with me one on one, go to Michelle Bourque coaching comm and click on Get started to begin