Ep 115 Who Are You Being and Why?
Episode Notes:
Join me today as I discuss the importance of being a person taking on your new habit/resolution/goal vs just doing the act of the habit. This time of year many people start working on new goals, but less than 10% stick to them. Listen as I discuss the two things you need to know in order to accomplish your goals and implement your new habits.
IN TODAYS EPISODE:
- Atomic Habits – James Clear – https://jamesclear.com/atomic-habits
- Podcast episode on Atomic Habits : https://michellebourquecoaching.com/atomic-habits/
- Being vs doing
- Compelling reason
- Making habits easy
- Setting yourself up for success
- Want to join me? www.michellebourquecoaching.com/course (free guide to start)
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Episode Transcript
Hello hello hello
Welcome back to the podcast
Happy New Year
We are heading into our 3rd year here you guys
How fun is that?
lol.
I think back to when I first started this
It was literally in my husbands closet
Which side note
I think is a hot mess lol
But it worked back then
I was also talking more about cutting back on wine
Which
As I worked with more people
I realized the true issues
Were more like escaping anxiety
Or
Not wanting to feel bored
Or
Feeling so overwhelmed
At the end of the day
And The wine was the only way to relax
And that’s when I changed the podcast
To It’s Your Time
And really focus on teaching concepts and tools
That allow you to be your amazing self at work
AND
Be able to do more of what you want in your life
And
Side note
I no longer record in my husbands closet..lol.
Lot’s of growth here friends
And when I look back at all of that
I realize
I’m being
A different person
And that’s what I want to talk to you about today
So many people make resolutions this time of year right?
Workout more
Eat cleaner
Maybe read more
Think about what that is for you
Or
Maybe you don’t make resolutions per say
But you do have some changes you want to make in your life
Or new habits you want to implement
This about what that is
Now I want you to think about who you are
Being
James Clear talks about this in his book
Atomic Habits
When you want to implement new habits
And for the purpose of this podcast
I am interchanging
Resolution and habit
Because I feel like sometimes they might be the same
It’s more that starting a new habit
Here’s what I mean
Are you someone who wants to read more books
Or are you being a reader
Do you want to work on eating better
Or are you being
A person who eats clean
Do you want to work out more
Or are you being
An athlete
Which by the way
You can be considered an athlete
And not be winning the gold medal at the olympics
Can you see the difference here?
One way of looking at it is just the taking the action
The other way
Is you show up being that person
Who already lives in a life that those habits
Are just who you are
Just automatic
So first take a moment to think about
Why you want to make these resolutions
Or start these new habits
What is your reason?
You want to make sure it is really compelling
So lets say you want to work out more
You want to be an athlete
Why
Most people’s initial response is something along the lines of
To be healthy
And that sounds lovely
But
When you wake up at 4am
To go workout
And it’s cold
And you were up late the night before
And you are tired
Your brain will likely tell you
You can be healthy tomorrow
Just hit snooze ..lol.
right?
Really –
Think about it
I think the number is like 92% of people
Don’t keep their resolutions
And think about how hard it can be start
Start a new habit
You have to have a really compelling reason
Here’s what you can do to help
When you come up with that first response
So
Lets say to be healthy
Ask your self why
Why do you want to be healthy
Get that answer
And then ask yourself why again
And maybe even again
So that it might come down to
You want to be healthy
So you can feel more energized
So you can do more with your kids
So you can show them an example of what is possible
See the difference between be healthy
And show your kids what is possible
Or
If you you don’t have kids like me
Maybe its to be an example to nieces
Or coworkers
Or to yourself
It doesn’t matter what my reason might be
It matters what your compelling reason is
That is more compelling
Than what your current reason is
For not being that person
Not doing that habit
And
The next question is
Think about how you think you will feel
Once you accomplish that goal
Or resolution
Or new habit
Do you think you will feel happy
Or successful
Or accomplished?
You have to feel that
Be that
Today
Think about this
Think about how you feel when you think
Something like
I want to feel happy
It comes from lack
It’s saying you aren’t happy
And let’s say you are trying to
Lets use lose weight for this
I want to lose weight
And then I will be happy
Usually
If you are not happy now
In order to feel happy
You might grab a cookie
Or extra glass of wine
And you just continue the cycle
Of
Wanting to be happy
What I’m suggesting is
You start being that person now
The person that is happy
The person that is at that weight
What does she do today?
What does she stop doing?
Maybe there are habits you need to break
In order to be her
Its an important shift
In creating any result you want
I use some of the obvious ones
So more people can likely relate
But it’s true for any new result
Let’s say you want to get a promotion
Think about how you would be
If you were already in that position
What decisions would you make
What would you not be doing
And start being all of that now
Its so fun
You believe it
Before you see it
And that’s how you create it
And I want to share another tip Clear talks about in his book
Which – I highly recommend if you are into any of this
Atomic Habits –
I actually did a podcast reviewing the book
And last time I checked it was the top downloaded episode
So –
Clear also talks about
The need to make your new habit easy
So let’s go back to the first one
Let’s say you want to work out in the morning
Have your clothes and sneakers all lined up in the morning
Plan your workout the night before
And stack it on a habit you already do
So maybe you currently have a habit of getting up and having coffee
Plan that as soon as you are done with your coffee
You start working out
Remember
Our brain wants easy and effecient
So if you can make it easy for your brain
You are way more likely to do it
Vs
Having to get up
Find your clothes
Think about what you want to do
Decide when you will fit it in
See the difference ?
Set yourself up for success friends
Have your own back
Honor the commitments you are making to yourself
And then be that person
Enjoy it all now
Today
Because
It really is all we currently have
Today
Remember
If you want to join me doing this work
You can begin with a free download
On strategies to
Just go to michellebourquecoaching.com/guide
And with that
Thats what I have for you today
Let’s circle back next week
But for now
Stay healthy
And make it a great day
Take care!