Ep 115 Who Are You Being and Why?

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Episode Notes:

Join me today as I discuss the importance of being a person taking on your new habit/resolution/goal vs just doing the act of the habit.  This time of year many people start working on new goals, but less than 10% stick to them.  Listen as I discuss the two things you need to know in order to accomplish your goals and implement your new habits.



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Episode Transcript

Hello hello hello 

Welcome back to the podcast 

Happy New Year

We are heading into our 3rd year here you guys

How fun is that?


I think back to when I first started this 

It was literally in my husbands closet 

Which side note 

I think is a hot mess lol

But it worked back then 

I was also talking more about cutting back on wine


As I worked with more people 

I realized the true issues

Were more like escaping anxiety 


Not wanting to feel bored 


Feeling so overwhelmed 

At the end of the day 

And The wine was the only way to relax

And that’s when I changed the podcast 

To It’s Your Time 

And really focus on teaching concepts and tools

That allow you to be your amazing self at work


Be able to do more of what you want in your life


Side note 

I no longer record in my husbands closet..lol.

Lot’s of growth here friends 

And when I look back at all of that 

I realize 

I’m being 

A different person

And that’s what I want to talk to you about today 

So many people make resolutions this time of year right?

Workout more 

Eat cleaner 

Maybe read more 

Think about what that is for you


Maybe you don’t make resolutions per say

But you do have some changes you want to make in your life 

Or new habits you want to implement 

This about what that is 

Now I want you to think about who you are 


James Clear talks about this in his book 

Atomic Habits 

When you want to implement new habits

And for the purpose of this podcast 

I am interchanging 

Resolution and habit 

Because I feel like sometimes they might be the same 

It’s more that starting a new habit 

Here’s what I mean 

Are you someone who wants to read more books 

Or are you being a reader 

Do you want to work on eating better 

Or are you being 

A person who eats clean

Do you want to work out more 

Or are you being 

An athlete 

Which by the way 

You can be considered an athlete 

And not be winning the gold medal at the olympics 

Can you see the difference here?

One way of looking at it is just the taking the action

The other way 

Is you show up being that person 

Who already lives in a life that those habits

Are just who you are 

Just automatic 

So first take a moment to think about 

Why you want to make these resolutions 

Or start these new habits 

What is your reason?

You want to make sure it is really compelling 

So lets say you want to work out more 

You want to be an athlete 


Most people’s initial response is something along the lines of 

To be healthy 

And that sounds lovely 


When you wake up at 4am 

To go workout 

And it’s cold 

And you were up late the night before 

And you are tired 

Your brain will likely tell you 

You can be healthy tomorrow 

Just hit snooze ..lol.


Really –


Think about it 

I think the number is like 92% of people 

Don’t keep their resolutions 

And think about how hard it can be start 

Start a new habit 

You have to have a really compelling reason 

Here’s what you can do to help 

When you come up with that first response 


Lets say to be healthy 

Ask your self why 

Why do you want to be healthy 

Get that answer 

And then ask yourself why again 

And maybe even again 

So that it might come down to 

You want to be healthy 

So you can feel more energized 

So you can do more with your kids 

So you can show them an example of what is possible 

See the difference between be healthy 

And show your kids what is possible 


If you you don’t have kids like me 

Maybe its to be an example to nieces 

Or coworkers 

Or to yourself 

It doesn’t matter what my reason might be 

It matters what your compelling reason is 

That is more compelling 

Than what your current reason is 

For not being that person 

Not doing that habit 


The next question is 

Think about how you think you will feel

Once you accomplish that goal

Or resolution 

Or new habit 

Do you think you will feel happy 

Or successful 

Or accomplished?

You have to feel that 

Be that 


Think about this 

Think about how you feel when you think 

Something like 

I want to feel happy 

It comes from lack

It’s saying you aren’t happy 

And let’s say you are trying to 

Lets use lose weight for this 

I want to lose weight 

And then I will be happy 


If you are not happy now 

In order to feel happy 

You might grab a cookie 

Or extra glass of wine 

And you just continue the cycle 


Wanting to be happy 

What I’m suggesting is 

You start being that person now 

The person that is happy 

The person that is at that weight 

What does she do today?

What does she stop doing?

Maybe there are habits you need to break 

In order to be her

Its an important shift 

In creating any result you want 

I use some of the obvious ones 

So more people can likely relate

But it’s true for any new result  

Let’s say you want to get a promotion 

Think about how you would be 

If you were already in that position 

What decisions would you make 

What would you not be doing 

And start being all of that now 

Its so fun 

You believe it 

Before you see it 

And that’s how you create it 

And I want to share another tip Clear talks about in his book 

Which – I highly recommend if you are into any of this 

Atomic Habits – 

I actually did a podcast reviewing the book 

And last time I checked it was the top downloaded episode 

So –

Clear also talks about 

The need to make your new habit easy 

So let’s go back to the first one 

Let’s say you want to work out in the morning 

Have your clothes and sneakers all lined up in the morning 

Plan your workout the night before 

And stack it on a habit you already do 

So maybe you currently have a habit of getting up and having coffee

Plan that as soon as you are done with your coffee

You start working out 


Our brain wants easy and effecient 

So if you can make it easy for your brain 

You are way more likely to do it


Having to get up 

Find your clothes

Think about what you want to do 

Decide when you will fit it in 

See the difference ?

Set yourself up for success friends 

Have your own back 

Honor the commitments you are  making to yourself 

And then be that person 

Enjoy it all now 



It really is all we currently have 



If you want to join me doing this work 

You can begin with a free download 

On strategies to 

Just go to michellebourquecoaching.com/guide

And with that 

Thats what I have for you today 

Let’s circle back next week 

But for now 

Stay healthy 

And make it a great day 

Take care!

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