Commitment, Compelling Reason & Who You Will Become in 2020
This is that time of year when everyone is talking about a fresh start and their goals for the new year. And while you can get a fresh start every single day, this is the time of year to really think about your goals and how you are going to take steps to achieve them. I want to help you work through your goals, why they are important to you, and how, with some intention and reflection, you can make it happen.
Topics in this episode
- Become the person that accomplishes that goal
- Visualize: what will you be like when the goal is accomplished? What will you act like? How will you feel?
- Be specific
- Being committed, no matter what
- Get curious. Why do you think you haven’t done it already?
- Get 1% better every day
- Worksheet: https://mailchi.mp/michellebourquecoaching.com/62
If you are ready to do this, I offer one-on-one private coaching, and it’s virtual. We’ll hop on a quick call just to make sure that we’re on the same page, we know where you are, and where you want to be. I want to make sure it’s a good fit and that I can help you. Go to https://michellebourquecoaching.com/work-with-me/ and let’s get started today.
Hello hello hello
Welcomes back to the podcast – and welcome to a new decade! I’m so excited to be here
I hope you are –
I have been thinking about you so much
And I have so many diﬀerent ideas for the new year I love this time of year
I really enjoy the organizing and thinking about starting fresh Again lol.
Right – we can actually start fresh every single day
But usually this time of year people start with some resolutions I really don’t do that
I’m not sure why – not good reason Or actually – maybe there was
I might not have always kept them
so it might have been easier to just stop doing them..lol.. Which is exactly what I want to talk to you about today
Ok – so we are in this goal setting mindset at the start of the new year right? Maybe for you its ﬁnd more balance in your life
Or lose a couple of lbs
Or maybe cut back on the vino Or maybe save some money All of if is fabulous
But I want to share with you what I have learned about the most important thing You have to have
In order to follow through
Today I want to talk to you about commitment, your compelling reason, and becoming the person who accomplishes that goal
That’s fun to think about right? Who you will become
I guess the question might be
Do you take the time to think about that? Like, really bring yourself to the place Where the goal is already accomplished? What will you be like?
What will you act like?
And most importantly – how will you feel? So much fun to think about that
Because honestly – the reason we do anything I Or not do
is because of how we think we will feel
Like when I clear up some debt I will feel more in control But I need to feel more in control now
In order to actually start taking the actions Of cleaning up the debt
You guys – we get it wrong
We think once we become thinner Or richer
Or whatever it is for you
That that’s when we will feel better
But have you ever lets say lost the 5 lbs you were looking to lose And then thought it wasn’t enough
You could shed a couple more
And THEN you would be happy I don’t think I’m the only one Or – I know for me
Last year this time I had all the debt paid down And guess what
This year I added some more
Because I really didn’t do all the thought work around it To begin with
So I want to help you with your commitment Let’s start there
Actually – ﬁrst
I want you to think about your goal Be very speciﬁc
Is it lose weight? How much?
Is it spend more time with the family? What does that mean?
Dinner together every night? Weekend day dates?
Be very speciﬁc
Now – when I talk about commitment
I’m talking about the quality of you being dedicated to it Are you 100% committed?
No matter what happens How committed are you?
If you tell me 100% committed and I say – great
So if you don’t accomplish it – will you pay be 75,000? No?
Not so sure now? Lol
Think about it – how committed are you to doing it – no matter what Being committed means even when it’s uncomfortable
Even when obstacles come along You have a certainty
Not that you won’t encounter challenges But that no matter what you encounter – you will ﬁgure it out
So now your brain has a clear goal And a commitment
And your brain wants to ﬁnd evidence for what you believe is true So this starts the process of getting to the goal
I also want you to get curious
Why do you think you don’t already have it?
Because usually what happens is we have a competing desire. So maybe we want to lose weight
And I just keep going back to this example because I feel like This time of year so many of you want this
We just came oﬀ the holidays and we get back to clean eating And the gym
At least for the ﬁrst couple of weeks
We have friends that own a gym and we used to laugh
At how busy it would be at the start of the year And then
Not so much
So – what are the competing desires why you don’t have it?
Maybe if its gym time the competing desire is you want to stay in bed longer
Maybe if you aren’t eating clean it’s because instead you use your time to stay at work Longer instead of meal prepping
I encourage you to write down all of the reasons why you think you don’t already have the goal Remember – awareness is key to making changes
so we want to know what our brain is telling us that seems so much better And usually that would be anything that avoids pain,
Seeks pleasure and/or – is easy right?
The motivational triad of the brain is to do all 3 Avoid pain,
Be as eﬃcient as possible
So – now that you have all the reasons
Its important to know these so we ﬁlter them out as we move towards the goal
OK – so now we have the clear and speciﬁc goal We have the commitment
Now why do you want to do this? This my friends is the key to success
I mentioned it at the start of the podcast
This is the most important thing in my opinion
What is your compelling reason why?
This is what convinces you that something should be done
And I’ll give you two questions to ask yourself as you consider this Why?
So let’s stick with the example of the losing a couple of pounds But if we are being speciﬁc lets say
Lose 5 pounds by March 17
Ask yourself why you want to do that First answer might be
To be healthy
Here is where I like to ask why?
Because I’m going to let you in on a secret
Lets say you have a great plan to get to the gym in the morning Because you want to be healthy
And then you don’t sleep well the night before The alarm goes oﬀ
And what do you think your brain wants to do in the moment?
I’m going to say hit snooze and tell you – we will be at the gym tomorrow Because remember
Avoid pain, seek pleasure, be eﬃcient Its the way of the human brain
And if I’m trying to on purpose say Oh – but I want to be healthy
My Brain is likely going to tell me I can be healthy tomorrow lol. right?
Again – I don’t think I’m the only one that has experienced this The reason is not compelling enough
So ask yourself why
And keep asking until it is truly a compelling reason Think about it
If the same scenario took place You didn’t sleep well
The alarm went oﬀ
And your kids life was on the line
You would have NO problem hopping out of bed to get to the gym See the diﬀerence?
That is a compelling reason
Now – think about what you need to do
to become the person who loses 5 pounds by March 17 I think sometimes we set these goals for ourselves
Well – maybe big goals
Because we have this idea that it has to be big in order to be worth it But really – all we need to do is get 1% better every day
Its who you become daily that gets you to that goal Its implementing new habits each day
That gets you to the goal
So what are some of the small changes you can make? The person that loses the weigh chooses the salad
The person that loses the weight has implemented movement How do you do that now?
I’ll be talking about new habit formations in upcoming episodes but just start thinking about
Who you become once you accomplish the goal
And don’t wait until it’s accomplished to be that person Start today
And if you don’t think 1% change is that much Think about a ﬂight that goes from point a
and is scheduled to arrive at point b
When the ﬂight plan is 1% oﬀ you my friend Will end up at point c
It makes a diﬀerence So –
What is your commitment – no matter what What is your reason why – this is everything
And think about how much fun it will be when you get there? Write it all down
And keep writing it down daily so you remember Think about this –
What will your future self be thankful for? So much fun to think about!
Let’s do this friends – I’m so excited to be here with you – 2020 – the year of clarity right? Listen – if you are ready I oﬀer one on one private coaching – virtually –
let’s hop on a quick call –
I do it with all my clients to see where you are – where you want to be –
and how we will get you there
I want to make sure I can help you
Go to www.michellebourquecoaching.com/workwithme and set up a time
Ok – that ’s what I have for you today
Let’s circle back next week But for now
Make it a great day Take care!